Sunday, May 8, 2016

I Need My Mom

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there! I hope your day is bright and wonderful, whether or not you're a mother.

This is a weird day for me. It's difficult to be sitting here on a day all about mothers and not think about how I was supposed to be one too at this point. And it's even harder not know when I will become a mother. Will I be one next Mother's Day? I'm sick of waiting and wondering!

Anyways, I'm not here to talk about my personal issues today (okay maybe a little). I'm here to talk about my mom.

I'm currently in the worst period of my life. Sad, but true. But you know what makes it better? Besides Chris, the one person able to help me through all of this is my mom.

My miscarriage messed me up. I was absolutely devastated when I learned I had lost my child. But you know what happened, my mom immediately drove up to see me and tell me everything would be alright. She had been through this too, and her words and love were the most comforting of anyone.

My mom is like my teammate and my biggest fan rolled in one. Whatever I set my mind to, my mom is there to help and support me through it. She's always cheering me on and believes in me. As someone who's confidence and self-image has been massively shaken recently, I keep realizing how much I need that support.

I need my mom.

I may be 25, married, parent to a crazy puppy, living two hours from my parents, and working nearly full-time, but I still need my mom.

And I probably always will.

It doesn't matter what happens in my life, I know I can always count on her. I know that she will always love me, unconditionally, even when I make mistakes... and I have made a lot of mistakes in my lifetime. She's never given up on me once and always believes I can achieve my dream.

There's a beautiful Taylor Swift song that always reminds me of my mom (listen to it HERE) but specifically these lyrics:

My mom has been my biggest fan through dance, school, writing, and anything I've set my mind to. She's let me live, doing what I want, and believes in me through it all. She wants me to succeed, do wonderful things, and shine.

I love my mom and I need her more and more as I get older. I don't know where I'd be without her. She gave me life, saved my life, and I need her in my life more than she'll ever know.


I promise this isn't an afterthought, but I also owe a lot to my mother-in-law Michelle. It's such a wonderful thing to get a second mom who will love and care for you no matter what. I love her so much and am so grateful that I was able to get her in my life! 


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