Sunday, October 11, 2015

Thoughts on Being Pregnant - Blogtober Day 11

Sorry today's post is late, but here are my original thoughts right after learning I was pregnant. As I warned you, most of this week will be stuff like this that I wrote in the past and was waiting for the right time to post. I hope you enjoy it!


It is currently August 5th, 2015, but this won't be posted on the blog for a while. Yesterday I took a test that I had been waiting for, looking forward to, for a very long time. And I passed. And my life immediately changed.

I'm pregnant.

I've honestly been looking forward to being a mom for a very very long time. But life throws you curves. I wanted to finish college first, but I left college. I wanted Chris to have graduated, but that's still a little less than a year away. I wanted more of my loan debt to be paid off. I wanted to be more financially stable. I wanted to be living outside of Cache Valley.

But more than all those wants, I want to be a mother. And even if none of that other stuff has happened, I get my number one goal.

I'm terrified in many ways. There's a lot I'll have to learn, certain aspects about pregnancy are scary, I can't currently comprehend how will we finance having a child, and the list goes on and on. It's scary, but I've never been happier in my life.

I wanted to write down these quick thoughts. To remember how I was feeling after finding out. More than anything I feel like life should have stopped. Come on life, give me a minute to take in this news and react!!! Right after taking the test I went to tell Chris. He gave me a hug and told me how excited he was, we've both been looking forward to this for a long time. But then I had to get ready for work, spent a full day at work, then went to a Young Women's activity until 10:30 at night. I didn't have time to react!!

Even now, sitting on my couch, watching Insurgent, I still don't know if this has fully hit me left. It was just an at home pregnancy test. I still need to see a doctor, make sure everything's alright, and then maybe things will feel real. But right now, as excited as I am, I don't think it's fully hit me yet.

I haven't had time to make a plan, figure out all I need to do, but at least I know I have some time. Things are changing already, but I know that I can rely on Chris, our families, and my Father in Heaven to help me get through it all.

I'm so grateful that this is finally happening for us! I stopped taking birth control last September and we've been seriously trying for a while now. We have been so blessed in multiple things in our lives. Our marriage has been a crazy whirlwind sometimes, but I couldn't image a more perfect person to start my eternal family with. I love Chris, and I already love our little fetus.

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